INCREDIBLE

It's a shame that human beings seem to be either too snobbish to ever consider listening to JoJo, a supposed pop r&b princess, or too oblivious to her actual existence to bother checking out the new material they might actually really like.

This is amazing and she namechecks Madonna, who might want to take a seat for this one (sorry Marge).

Oh dear...

We love you JoJo, we love this song, but this video is boring and there is almost nothing to say on the subject. We have sat thinking for a good long five minutes and we can't think of anything (positive or negative) to offer.

God we love you, JoJo

• "You're on the set of my new video, "Disaster"
  
• "We're going to be seeing the inner workings of a relationship that starts out good and then turns out to be... disastrous." - LITERAL
• "My boyfriend in this video is a motorcyclist so he runs the stop light and there's an accident and... it's not good." - LITOTES
• "I kind of like... snapped during the recording process. I kind of lost my mind." - WORRYING
  

Sordid.

Minimal budget, but the message here is clear: JoJo's all growed up lolz. Oh and she likes sex.

This qualifies as experimental!?

We love a bit of JoJo and we're deeply anticipating her new album, as the leaked tracks that'll supposedly not make the final cut are increderoons in their own right, so just IMAGINE the wealth of brilliance that actually does end up on the thing. This, however, is from her upcoming Mixtape, Can't Take That Away From Me, which supposedly allows her to get the experimental material out of her system so she can do the commercial tracks on her proper third studio alb.

So we have 'experimental' track "In The Dark". It's... interesting, certainly, especially considering JoJo's usual style limitations, but experimental? Really? Some of the sort of sub-trip-hop bits in the chorus are very nice, but did her epic voice really need to be obliterated by autotune? Was that really necessary.

Perhaps necessitates repeat listens.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY.

We like to pretend we're all sophisticated here at Shiny & New - "oooh yes Björk is popular music's great unsung genius, Tori Amos this, Tori Amos that, BRING BACK KATE BUSH, Madonna isn't just a popstar she's a feminist warrior, Erykah Badu transcends genre, style and ZeItGeIsT, Antony and the muthafucking Yohnsons rule yo world".

Well anyway, perhaps 'pretend' is the wrong word, because as misguided and pompous as that sounds, it's exactly how we feel. STILL. At the same time, we also feel that THIS (click click click) is a bonafide modern pop CLASSIC. Not to mention that three of the songs leaked from JoJo (for it is she)'s upcoming album All I Want Is Everything, are actually officially certified topnotch: "Wrong Man For The Job", "Keep Forgetting (To Forget About You)" and "Forever in my Life". They are shimmering modern power ballads and JoJo has (gosh we don't know what it is) but a certain je ne sais quoi (bleh) that lifts them from snoresome Leona territory to triumphant, euphoric pop.

Anyway her new album is finally coming out 'soon'.

Yay!

JoJo hearts the gays...

The ongoing saga of when JoJo's evil record label are going to let her release her 3rd album has come to a head and, if the world renowned and consistently factual news resource Twitter is to be believed, the story has a happy ending (for JoJo at least). Over the past couple of years countless demos have been leaked, supposedly from this album's sessions. Many have been drivel, some have been barely acceptable and a few have been absolutely golden.

We've already written about the MIGHTY "Wrong Man For The Job" and have been enjoying the fairly sublime "Forever In My Life" for many moons now, but we have yet to even touch upon brilliant 'leak' "Keep On Forgetting (To Forget About You)". It is below. It is fabulous. Enjoy.

What has JoJo been up to?

Believe it or not, we here at Shiny & New are into JoJo. Yeah, yeah, it's just one of those things we can't explain. You can whinge all you like but "Too Little Too Late" is one of the best pop songs ever written ("We disagree with you" - Everyone else ever born with ears) and "Leave (Get Out)" is not far behind. So it is with great excitement that we greeted the news of a 3rd JoJo album, for with it, it would possibly bring an earth shatteringly good lead single. Apparently, however, Little Baby Jesus doesn't want this to happen. There have been reports that JoJo is suing her record label because they just won't let her release it.

Anyway... we know absolutely NOTHING (we are ridiculously ill-informed/bad at researching) about what is really going on, or whether we'll ever get that longed for 3rd JoJo album, but in the meantime here is a relatively bonkersly good pop ditty that's leaked. It might be on the album. it might not be. It might not even be a JoJo demo (it's happened before). So anyway... enjoy (oh and at least get to the chorus before you never visit our blog again).