COVERART WARZZZZ! Part #8

Two perennially underrated pop juggernauts. Two stunning 9-track pop albums (admittedly one's from last year). One coverart war.



Impact:
Kelis: 9/10 (immediately eye-catching)
Shakira: 7/10 (glitter and sea-froth green - arresting)

Strike a Pose:
Kelis: 6/10 (wonky arms, but projecting face like no other)
Shakira: 5/10 (symmetrical but nonchalant)

Logo and Font Factor:
Kelis: 4/10 (busy and messy, if memorable)
Shakira: 6/10 (unimaginative but practical)

Overall Iconicity Factor:
Kelis: 7/10 (very amazing, but messy)
Shakira: 5/10 (fairly amazing)

And the winner is...
Kelis! Are these actually interesting/worth doing any more?!

COVERART WARZZZZ! Part #7

Gold vs. Gold!
Glitter vs. Glitter!
Critically maligned vs. Critically maligned-er!



Overall Aesthetic:
Ke$ha: 6/10 (it's... arresting)
Ellie Goulding: 5/10 (we said: advert for a Boots' teenage makeup line)

Artist's 'Pose':
Ke$ha: 4/10 (she looks mildly engaged)
Ellie Goulding: 2/10 (distracted/on the brink of suicide)

Use of Glitter:
Ke$ha: 6/10 (basic but effective)
Ellie Goulding: 7/10 (creative, striking, twee)

Overall Iconicity Factor:
Ke$ha: 5/10 (it could age well)
Ellie Goulding: 5/10 (it could age well)

And the winner is...
Ke$ha! Another one of those 'lesser of two evils' but there we go. Such is the way of the world.

COVERART WARZZZZ! Part #6

Well this was inevitable, wasn't it?



Strikingness:
Lady GaGa: 9/10 (it's grown on us IMMENSELY)
Rihanna: 10/10 (her eyes go through you like a bag of prunes)

Styling:
Lady GaGa: 10/10 (well, it's GaGa, it's perfect...)
Rihanna: 9/10 (it's a look...)

Font/Logo:
Lady GaGa: 8/10 (iconic, but loses marks for inconsistency with last campaign)
Rihanna: 7/10 (the 'R' is nice but you can't see album title)

Overal Iconicity Factor:
Lady GaGa: 9/10 (it's her 'Like A Prayer')
Rihanna: 9/10 (it's her 'True Blue')

And the winner is...
Lady GaGa, but it was REALLY fucking close. And they're both superfantastic (let's just choose to ignore the other 'Fame Monster' cover - it's hideous).

COVERART WARZZZZ! Part #5

They both won they X Factor, they're both girls, they're both good at warbling, they both hail from London. OTHER THAN THAT THEY HAVE NOTHING IN COMMON. We're going to compare their coverarts anyway...



Shininess:
Leona Lewis: 10/10 (actual waxwork lady)
Alexandra Burke: 9/10 (very healthy sheen)

Beautosity:
Leona Lewis: 4/10 (well, it's a look...)
Alexandra Burke: 6/10 (a bit blank-eyed, but very pretty)

Styling:
Leona Lewis: 5/10 (the dress could be lovely, BUT THE HAIR)
Alexandra Burke: 5/10 (nice dress and hair, HORRIBLE JEWELLRY)

Font/Logo:
Leona Lewis: 4/10 ('meh', but it glows!)
Alexandra Burke: 3/10 (just 'meh', really)

Overal Iconicity (X) Factor:
Leona Lewis: 7/10 (we hate to admit it, but it's 'iconic' looking)
Alexandra Burke: 6/10 (get back to us in 10 years)

And the winner is...
Leona Lewis, not that we're going to listen to her album, now or EVER. Sorry Alexandra, we love you, and we will listen to your album, slightly dodgy cover or not.

COVERART WARZZZZ! Part #4

It's anodyne R&B Divas Edition!!!!!



Hotness:
Keri Hilson: 5/10 (gorgeous lady in awkward position)
Ciara: 3/10 (beautiful woman looks shiny)

CGI Backdrop:
Keri Hilson: 6/10 (violet fantasy sunrise)
Ciara: 2/10 (cheap purple Gotham)

LOGO:
Keri Hilson: 4/10 (unmemorable but shit)
Ciara: 4/10 (memorable but shit)

Photoshop Skillzzzzzzz:
Keri Hilson: 7/10 (irridescent indigo mess)
Ciara: 1/10 (crayons in Paint)

And the winner is...
Keri Hilson... but only by virtue of being the lesser of two evils. TRY HARDER LADIES.

COVERART WARZZZZ! Part #3

Or, the Inevitable 'Sound of 2009' pop tartlet faceoff. Both Little Boots and La Roux are good pop things and we're quite excited for their debut albums. We don't really think they're anything alike, other than their stage names both start with the letter "L", but let's pointlessly compare their album artwork anyway.



Possible 'Iconic' Factor:
La Roux: 8/10 (rather striking and memorable)
Little Boots: 5/10 (busy but has potential)

Amazing/Silly Hair Factor:
La Roux: 9/10 (big, ginger minge, err... fringe)
Little Boots: 4/10 (Swiss Princess Leia)

Typography:
La Roux: 6/10 (interesting font and nice logo consistency)
Little Boots: 4/10 (hardly memorable, is it, readers?)

Photoshop Skillzzzzzzz:
La Roux: 7/10 (Elly looks shiny and robotic)
Little Boots: 8/10 (sexy space explosion)

And the winner is...
La Roux... although we're looking forward to Little Boots' album more, for the record.

COVERART WARZZZZ! Part #2

It's Patrick Wolf vs. Bat For Lashes (a.k.a. Natasha Kahn)! Let's get this violent battle on the road (oh dear).



Big overall epic sense of doom
Patrick: 8/10 (Camping trip turns apocalyptic)
Natasha: 8/10 (Candle shop turns out to lead to watery Narnia)

Ye Olde Font/Logo
Patrick: 6/10 (Amateurish font strangely looks ok)
Natasha: 5/10 (Too small and a bit H&M accessories logo)

Sense that artist is ridiculously important
Patrick: 9/10 (Cavalry soldier is secret sorcerer with flashy powers)
Natasha: 10/10 (Natasha Kahn is Mother Earth/Nature/Goddess)

Overall big sweeping impact
Patrick: 7/10 (Quite good, silly, epic artwork)
Natsha: 8/10 (Messy, but looks like no other artwork we've seen)

And the winner is...
Bat For Lashes!

*History in the making*

COVERART WARZZZZ! Part #1

This time... (the first time)... it's Alesha's new album 'The Alesha Show' vs. Britney's new album, 'Circus'.


Ridiculous hair
Britney: 4/10 (à la Jessica Simpson)
Alesha: 6/10 (à la Frizzy poodle)

Silly cream curtain
Britney: 5/10 (Crumply and matte)
Alesha: 10/10 (Silky and ruched)

Big red curtains
Britney: 0/10 (Off-photo, twixt her legs)
Alesha: 7/10 (Present and correct with gold-tassled ropes)

Retro font
Britney: 10/10 (Sort of Counting Crows' 'Hard Candy' meets real-life Circus font)
Alesha: 4/10 (Fairly run-of-the-mill)

And the winner is...
Alesha.

Well that was fucking boring wasn't it?