Stuck In Our Head: Bumper Edition

While we've been spending approximately 85% of our listening time in the company of MDNA, we've encountered the odd song here and there which has forced it's way into our crowded brains.




The amazing Trash-o-Rama played an incredible remix of Lana Del Ray's "Blue Jeans" at the last Bollox, produced by the also amazing Club Clique guys - do you feel the Manchester love? - and it's not left us alone since. We still haven't made up our minds totally on Llama but we're obsessed with her vocals on the "I will love you til the end of time" line. This morning we discovered another Clique remix, this time of Saint Etienne's glorious new track "Tonight". Ramping up the melancholy euphoria we're so obsessed with a few more notches, we can see ourselves having a 'moment' if we hear it on the floor.




Two more glorious remixes we were introduced to through Trash are the Hudson Mohawke re-fixes of our favourite ever Janet track "The Pleasure Principle" and Tweet's "Oops! (Oh My)". Darker, sexier, pulsating slices of dance floor magic. Both have been floating around for months (maybe years?), but we're were clearly in the dark for too long. Obsessed...


...which conveniently leads us into our thoughts on HudMo's own EP. We imagine his profile will explode at some point over the next twelve months, as his blend of hetero-friendly club beats with an incredibly gay musical sensibility and awareness of homo club culture seems to rock everybody's boat. "All Your Love" sparkles and shimmers, leaving the listener breathless with ecstasy.




Finally, two tracks we encountered sitting on our rooftop in the recent burst of sunshine which flooded Manchester with unnecessary skin exposure (and even more unnecessary skin damage). We've never delved into Angie Stone's discography despite being enamoured with many of her contemporaries (holla at me Jill and Erykah), but we found ourselves enraptured with her 2001 "I Wish I Didn't Miss You Anymore" as dusk fell and the positively electrifying undercurrent of the piano caused a 'moment'. A magical sample and a perfect combination of chords. Next, Frank Ocean's "Swim Good" has been floating around since August last year but it seemed to take hearing it in the sunshine for it to 'click'. We're seeing him at the Manchester Academy tonight with that douche Tyler the Creator, so we'll be sure to report back along with our reviews of Kylie's two night residency in the very same venue.

See you Tuesday.

Yes that's all very well but can you please tour the United Kingdom thank you very please...

Shiny & New Turns 2: #11 "Miss You Much" - Janet Jackson

"Shot like an arrow going through my heart / That's the pain I feel / I feel whenever we're apart"

My romance with Janet Jackson has not been as long as I would have hoped. After downloading the seminal "Rhythm Nation" a few years ago on recommendation from a friend, she remained unlistened to for a while until on whim I decided to download the album on which it appeared and the preceding Control. I soon found myself filled with frustration that I hadn't taken the plunge sooner. In the UK, Janet seems to be constantly, very unfairly, shoved in the shadow of her impossible to ignore brother, yet she really does have a wealth of material to her name which undeniably marks her as one of the most talented individuals of the eighties and nineties.

I have several Janet favourites, many of them coming from the very first two albums I downloaded. However for some reason "Miss You Much" stands as the best example of why Janet - Ms. Jackson if yo nasty - has produced some of the most melodic, danceable pop music in recent years. After the throbbing drum machine paves the way for the mesmerising synth which follows, the frustration-filled lyrics take over the spotlight and the voicing of her resentment at how much she longs for her lover is more than audible. Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis, Janet's almost career-long production partners, used industrial, harsh sounds in the background of this otherwise synth-heavy track and not once are you fooled into believing this is a simple love song.

We'll hand it over to two people who can do it better.

A year since one of the most amazing, magical, spellbinding, suitable-adjective-defying entertainers the world has ever known passed away and nothing we can write will pack the awe, grandeur and emotional punch a tribute to Michael Jackson requires - the video above possibly does.

Belated Fire.

Just pure unadulterated fabulousness. Nothing more, nothing less.

Amazing.

Stuck In Our Head: "Rock With You" - Janet Jackson

We'll admit, we're late to the party with this, but Janet Jackson's 2008 album, Discipline, is a glitteringly brillo pop/R&B album. We've had "LUV", "2nite" AND "Rollercoaster" all stuck in our head recently. But this one sticks out especially for its unforgettable love-it-or-hate-it line: "strobe lights make everything sexy, yeah". We love you Miss Janet.

Things in pop music which baffle us #4512

Today's discussion point, beloved readers, is why Janet Jackson's album artwork has become so fucking shit. We've only really got into Janet in the past twelve months, so we're still very new fans and still introducing ourselves to the entire spectrum of her musical offerings. Already, we are noticing a dangerously close correlation between the quality of artwork and the music on the albums themselves.

Because it's a Sunday and we very rarely do anything on Sundays, here is the result of about ten minutes labour in providing a visual reference of our opinions on Janet Jackson's album artwork. Starting from Control because everyone else pretends the ones before that don't exist.

Crap song, gorge vid.

We like;

• The homage to "Scream". Computer generated spikes, minimalist monochrome space ship dining state rooms etc.
• Spiky shoulder pads.
• The costumes in general.

We don't really like;

• The length of her high heels. Longer and spikier please. Current fierce rating: 3. Potential fierce rating: 9.
• Song is a bit dull for a greatest hits-cum-comeback tune.

That's yer lot!

This Is Your Career (In Artwork): Pop Divas

We thought we'd try a new thing where we look at artists' careers through their album artwork. That's about it. It's a simple concept and we're going to dive right in. First we're going to look at Female Pop Divas (male ones are a whole different story) and we've chosen 5 of the biggest in terms of worldwide success and/or Icon Factor (a made-up factor that we made up).

To start with we're going to look at Mariah. Notice the muted pallet, the abundance of sepia and noire. The close ups. The soft focus. The pink. The sparkles. THE HAIR. Mariah has never been our cup of tea, and none of the writers for Shiny & New particularly like her, despite soft spots for certain songs of hers. We havent got much more to say about this other than that it reflects her melodramatic, yet essentially boring music. None of these album covers are particulary iconic... I mean, they're memorable or recognisable but not ICONIC. On top of that, most of them aren't actually that aesthetically pleasing, either.

Next we move on to the underdog of global female pop icons. Despite having had briefly HUGE success in the 80s, her continued success has been sputtering and sporadic. In terms of how iconic these covers are, well... they're NOT that iconic. If you asked most people of the street, or even most music fans, they'd struggle to remember what Cyndi's album covers look like. Nevertheless there's some beautiful photography, and the offbeat, colourful designs reflect her music and style as Madonna's twisted little sister brilliantly.

Which brings us to Koylie Minoigue (the Austroilian pronunciation). Kylie is the poor man's Madonna, and despite being massively famous worldwide, still isn't all that big in America. Despite finding Kylie weak, boring, emotionless, flaccid and puppet-like we have a MASSIVE penchant for her music, much of which is really brillo pads pop and electro. The typography on the album covers is ANYTHING but unique (has she ever stuck to ONE logo?) and some of the earlier coverart is EXECRABLE at best, but the bland but stylish images sort of capture the essence of Kylie, don't they?

Our next study is Janet Jackson, a deeply mysterious woman, who throughout her career has managed to flit her way between deeply brilliant and meaningful pop and soul, and completely forgettable tripe. Her album artwork sort of reflects this. There's not much consistency, but strangely they sit quite nicely next to eachother. It's quite odd to connect the artist who is sexily and broadly smiling like a catalogue model in some shots, with the more troubled looking lady inhabiting the more iconic shots (from Rhythm Nation, Control and The Velvet Rope). In terms of how Iconic these cover squares are... these are probably the most iconic yet. But that's because we haven't covered....

Madonna. The Queen of Queens. She needs no introduction. Her album artwork speaks for itself. Every single one of these album covers is Iconic, and not just because she's the most famous person on the planet. They are all brilliant album covers. The only consistency is that they're consistently brilliant and each one perfectly represents what the music on the album sounds like. One of our writers might complain that she doesn't stick with one logo, but when the rest of the design is this good, you really CANNOT complain.

Long Live The Queen!!!

Stuck In Our Head: "Control" - Janet Jackson

So it's 1986. While Madonna is making a tit out of herself making soon-to-bomb movies with an ex-Beatle and Sean Penn, Michael Jackson's little sister released her third album, Control. Her previous two had sunk without a trace, but perhaps due to her new-found projection of independence, sexuality and a feminine masculinity (not few have mastered that), her career was launched. Janet Jackson would be the world's biggest selling female solo artist if it wasn't for.. erm.. Madonna... but it would seem in recent years, she's made a complete prat of herself. Albums and tours failing left right and centre, it's refreshing to go back a few years to when Janet Jackson wasn't just good, but amazing.

"Control", the debut single from the eponymous album, is full of defiant energy sealed in a distilled 80s R&B hook, and for me, someone who previously didn't get the big fuss about this woman, showed me why she was so massive. Apologies for the nine minute video, it seemed she got a bit ahead of herself and tried to do another "Thriller". The first of many JJ fails...