A whole universe of 'No'.

Oh god... where DO we begin.

Ok. Let us first start by saying that views on Patrick Wolf as a MUSICIAN are mixed here at Shiny & New. Some of us think he's put out some truly great stuff, and some of us just don't get it. WHICH IS FINE.

However, we think every single person who has ever come into contact with us can agree that as a PERSON, Patrick Wolf is... well... in the words of one of our lecturers "a bit of a cunt" (we're not even joking).

First of all there was that strange episode where he stormed off stage and said he was quitting music because his drummer was wasted... which is odd because we've heard on the grapevine that he likes a certain horsey intoxicant himself.

Then there was the whole business of whether or not he really wanted to be commercially successful. It seemed like he did. I mean it doesn't immediately mean that you make terrible music so he could have taken it and ran with it. But he didn't. Instead of employing charm, humour and good-naturedness, he often displayed grumpiness, surliness and humourlessness when being interviewed.

This did not enamour him to us/the public at ALL.

Then there was the whole Madonna thing where he claimed that he was beaten up by bodyguards at her concert for kissing his boyfriend. We can't verify this but we are fairly sure he was in fact beaten up somewhere completely different and had been drunkenly provoking someone. If he was indeed lying, to drum up some publicity then we are not only disappointed but also rather sickened.

Anyway Patrick Wolf (who once opened for Mika and then came home and bulletined on Myspace about how we should all stop buying shit pop music) doesn't seem to realise that being aloof and artishly cunty is not really the way forward... either that or he just doesn't care about shifting records anymore.

Thus we have his new video up above. To be fair... the song is quite good. It's not earth shatteringly good. It won't change your life. It's not as genius as some of his past stuff. But it's good.

The video, however, is full of shots of Patrick Wolf's bottom and some S&M fetish gear. We have no doubt that his glittery fanboys are rejoicing and having multiple wanks as we speak but all it said to us, was "ew".