WTF!?1!?!!11 get sexee

And so the new Sugababes single, "Get Sexy" has leaked/premiered/has been born unto this world. Now we like the Sugababes. We appreciate their commercial success, and have fondness for many of their tracks. We even have warm memories of listening to Angels With Dirty Faces on pirate copy CD back when pirate copy CDs were relevant. We appreciate the girls' desire to try something different, which we recommended after the utter drivel of Catfights and Spotshites as we have come to know their 2008 opus as at Chateau de S&N.
Try again.

The girls picked producers who are 'hot' at the minute. Natural choice. The song is made up of elements from songs which are 'hot' at the minute. Natural... but not very good. The song was bred, brewed and brought up to be a number one hit from its point of conception but that doesn't mean it's a good song. It's actually awful. It's as if the girls just sat down and took a look at the current Billboard chart in America.

Keisha: SO GURLZ, LYK WT DO AMERICANS LYK? TWEET ME BK TY XXX
Amelle: Brap brap.
Heidi: *incoherent Scouse babble, too foggy to translate even to cyberspace*

Its backing track is unmistakably directly lifted from "Boom Boom Pow", with the chorus synths actually a direct copy of the breakdown following Fergie's inspirational "People in the place" speech. The lyrics were clearly written by the girls while attending a night class at Lil' Wayne's Academy for Songwriting. Our heads have reached their cringe capacity for the day (we just listened to the song twice in a row) so we can't even re-print some of the diabolical classics.

What are the girls playing at? Are they really and truly trying to finally crack America? Well they won't, unfortunately, and this effort will only embarrass them further. Expect to hear this on the dancefloors of "Liquid and Envy"s up and down the country very very soon. Expect to hear this in our iTunes never.

(We'd just like to point out that the writer of this 'ere article very quickly did an about-face and decided that in spite of the horrendous lyrics and derivative sound, "Get Sexy" was indeed a 'club' 'banger'. We don't think it's in his iTunes, even now, but still... we can all learn something about the redemptive power of song - Ed)